The lost of memory is a scarier than you think

Ok. I know many are in daze of confusion. I too have am pretty confuse over this past week on how things are working out and it seems like I am in a dream.

Coincidentally on Saturday I shared from the pulpit that we must start the year with a BANG! and truly that night itself it started with a BANG! But it wasn't that kind of bang that I intended to have.

I received 2 messages on Saturday from my girlfriend one of them say "I dono what's happening" and the other "I Can't remember anything! What Happen!" I replied and got this message saying she's in hospital and she don't know who she is. My immediate reaction was that she was drugged. She don't know who she was when I called her and her dad is like in a distant. Later I came to know that it was an accident. She had a concussion. I was awake till 2-3 reacting like how I would react in movies trying to be calm.

Things got worst when she woked up at 5am and smsed me asking did she lose her memory. I was like what? you just did came back concious and now you lost your memory that you were in hospital and all... Later that day she came back to memory and everything although still scared but showed a lot of courage. And thank you everyone for praying. You can read more about what happend next in her blog

But what is even more bizzare that was how God worked. She was completely unharmed. No blood, No broken bone, CTscan is completely fine. I was restless I had more trauma and I am usually not a very shaken person. However I find peace in church. I find peace when I played the guitar later that day and sang.

And the thing about this was I had this feeling that an accident will happen to her the whole weekend she's away to Kedah. I don't know why but somehow the Holy Spirit was warning me something. But the sad thing is I ignored it. I just thought to myself that it must be something stupid. But little did I know that whoa I have spider sense.

Jokes aside. Life is precious. You never know when it last. Treasure each moment before its too late. Cliche? You bet, but it is true as well.

Anyway, she's alright now. Praise God. Thanks for praying everyone! I am truly touched.

And my heart will sing how great is our God

My heart is troubled. I have been troubled for almost one full day by now. The incident had probably shooked me up from slumber.

Times like this is truly a hard time to praise God's name right? Yet in the midst of all this, I am also struggling with faith and hope and salvation. Maybe I have always played safe. I don't do this then this this this won't happen. My life is dull. I hardly had chance to practice faith and this is a good time to do so.

I am also shaken and tried to speak in tongues but that did not work this time for some strange reason (afterall this is a period of time of 'revival') But when I was at morning worship service, my heart were calm when we sang songs. Although its still the normal song that we sing week after week somehow when you are in that situation, you'll feel like hey that's my heart song.

But then soon after I got home I started to feel anxious again and I picked up my guitar and sang How great is our God. Somehow that song seems different now, It reminds me of the various psalms in the bible where people are praising the Lord even though they are in difficulties and that does not make any sense to me but as I sang, I felt that I've been comfort and gives me strenght.

I have written many draft by now about the incident but I did not publish because I did not feel that I was writing well. Somehow I am moved to write this because maybe you are in the same situation feeling despair and hopeless. I pray that you'll find refuge in Jesus. Truly he is great and awesome.

You know what? Positive stuff came out. I use simple stuff and shared about church and how people are praying to her family. Hope of God is also in contact with the family and who knows? If it threw me to rethink my life, I am sure it throws a lot of people to rethink about their life.

I wept at the altar today. I felt the presence so strong. I just wept. Today's message was appropriate. It talks about how God gives life to the dead. And how he brings water to the desert.

P/S Thank you for praying for me and Joleen, guys and girls. I really appreciate it. I know some of you don't know what to say to me like just stuck or speechless. You don't have to say anything, just keep us in your prayers!

P/P/S For those who don't know what happen, Maybe I will blog about it sometime in future as now is not the right time to tell you what had just happen. Instead of asking me what happen, just pray for strenght for both of us... Thanks! =)

Happy Birthday!

Ahh I am so totally late for not doing the elluminatography this week on time. I was suddenly down with whole lot of work that I can't complete my post and I certainly am stupid to resize the photo that I wanted to use -.- In short, I am late.

Anyhow, this is my girlfriend on her birthday 25 October =)



I love you =)

Awwwwwwwwwwwww

The Apartment

The Apartment is the 9th restaurant I went to in the Curve. I am not rich. Just that every celebration we eat something nice. This time however it was here decision because its her treat. It's a Christmas Meal.

So I get a chance to stress test my camera. I know I know. Compact camera is bad. What more cybershot right? WRONG! I did some pretty nice shots. Of course I am trying to make it into a pro-camera, by being a pro rather than letting camera to be the pro. Anyway, here are the photos.


Just loving the lights


I think that's pretty original, but it is cheapo.


That's our appetizer


Her meal


My meal


She thinks I haven't had enough so this was the last course


We went for movie after the meal and we watched He is Legend and to be honest, Watch it. But be prepared to feel all lonely after the movie. It is saddening. I think it is the saddest after Pursuit of Hapyness


Anyway, one for the album!

There all done by John's little green the cheap lousy cybershot toy compact camera

2 years and going on

Well it has been 2 years and so this is a time for celebration! I decided to take her out to the curve since there is plenty of food around there, but due to various reasons the jam is horrible. We got there about 8:30 and decided to try out marche.

2 person, pizza, potato, and plenty of cheese (so you can enjoy and spend lessor... top it up with carbonated drinks...) yea yea cheap date I am... NOT! we still manage to spend quite a bit but it is worth it to see smiles on faces.

So less words pictures please yeap. Here the shot.


Here's in the market where you pick the best tatos... erm nope you just order them


Looking good with the sausage. Takes about 15 minutes to cook one. Long huh


The tatos I just ordered with salmon in it. Very very zai to eat that


Her current cravings


Pizza man making my Hawaiian Chicken


It is better than pizza hut. DUH


Just one can guarantee you no need eat for 3 days.


That's all we ordered. Still got a lot left to try but I ate like 5 slices of pizza and a whole lot of that sausage.


Digging in


Of course we got to take a picture of us. Look at what's on her fork. Told you was her cravings. haha. And I have never see myself pulling my mouth that big before.

That's it.

My iPod sadly erm had a face issue. it looks like Nathan Petrelli after Peter exploded. And now seems like I having an iPod shuffle. Just that it is like 30gb of iPod shuffle. Any kind souls like to take my iPod to the service centre?

Social Butterfly?

I know there are a few social butterfly which well are social, some short, some fat...

That's not the point no-no... years ago (many many) Me and my character have always suggested that I was a loner, Not many friends, just me and me. I don't like mixing around, I don't like talking and probably am shy when I was a kid. When I was a teenager, I was quiet as well. Again, I really talked to Jennifer (more than 2 sentence kind) after knowing her for 7 years. See?

After that, some would call me hostile, some would call me unfriendly, some assume that I hate them haha well, that period I would like to call it - lazy. Yep I am lazy to make new friends thinking oh gee how long will it take to really able to hang out together and know him/her, so I shunned away.

I love being alone, I love the rain, it would trigger my emo-ness... But I like being alone, when I am alone, I think of all sorts of things... Imaginative, problems, solutions etc... I often look around when I am alone, I look how people behave.

Like for example, Just a few days ago, I was a waffle world alone eating erm waffles and I was watching kids playing their game and how one small girl kept posing to the camera. And after that say mommy I want to see I want to see. I can't help buy kept wondering, wow what a lucky kid she is. I don't have the luxury to pose 2nd time when I was a kid, what's ugly is ugly hahaha.

But now being alone is a whole different story, since I am a busy nonsocial bee, I would have no time to waste sitting around and doing nothing. As for my loner behaviour, it is fading away as I surface more and begin to meet people more. Now I don't get stuck when I am with a new person. I start the conversation. I can go around getting to know people. Sometimes it feels odd really. But it is how it is.

Today being alone is very unusual for me, I am missing Joleen of course, being alone without her is miserable. But overall I can't be alone for long now, I don't know is it good or bad. I used to hate going to youth group because I don't have friends. Now usually Sunday afternoon is really doom for me. After a long weekend of hanging with church friends, you come to quietness and lonliness. odd. Do I like it? I don't know, Am I being myself? I am not, but I have a duty to carry, and that duty has made me someone else. Which I assume that it would be good.

Altight, That's it.. GOod night world